Wednesday, August 23, 2006

"Stuff" from T'rono

A lunch time walk downtown is never dull. This gentleman appeared on the corner last week proclaiming himself to be Mr. Toronto and holding a banner with the words Toronto Appreciation Day.

What-up dawg?! He is gallivanting around the country with a banner, a camera and a insulated coffee mug full of ... ah... well ... Poop actually. He calls it "Toronto Sludge" and he offered it as a gift to Newfoundland and Labrador because as "everyone knows we don't have a lot of arable land and this stuff is a "rich multicultural stew"." He didn't get any takers on his gift oddly enough. Maybe it was because anything offered up from Toronto can't be good news; or perhaps it was the fact that the smell from his "stew" was enough to overpower even the infamous funk of "the bubble". Given that "the bubble" is being stirred fresh by bulldozers, the fact that the Toronto version could, not only do battle with our local brew, but in fact overpower it... no small feat for a coffe-mug of treated poo.

The real stink from Mr. Toronto though comes from the fact that he is sponsered by the CBC. Our CBC. With a grant, a bottle of poo and a camera there he goes spending the bucks of Canada's broadcaster.

Of course this is all meant to be a tongue in cheek look at Canada's hatred for our Quasi-New York. The intention appears to be to show how great Toronto is by filming the fall-out of Canada's other cities to make T.O look good in comparison. With a small assortment of professionals and tourists out for their lunch time stroll he finds the one poor unfortunate who has stumbled upon the scene on his way from the booze laden bars of George Street. "and you sir - what do you think of Toronto sludge!"

I'm sure it will be a quality piece of work worthy of the quality of the CBC. If it doesn't work out he can stuff the film into a Horton cup and offer it around the Country as new and improved sludge from Toronto.


Mr. Toronto said...

Hey - That's a great picture of me! I had a great time "on the rock," it's beautiful! Not as beautiful as Toronto, but close enough!

BNB said...

hahaha wicked! Looking forward to the documentary. Be careful with that coffee mug...

I'll say one thing for you, you know how to take the blows