Thursday, July 13, 2006

Danny and The White Moose

(This is a bit in the style of Rex Murphy)

The stuff of legends; the genetic anomaly that is the white moose. This albino was once thought to be a fallacy. A mis-identified caribou or the resulting exaggeration of an inebriated outdoorsman. In these days of technology when cell phones have cameras and the world is connected via streaming bits of information from a variety of media, there is not much that can remain concealed. The Giant Squid - the Kraken, The coelacanth and the white moose have all been brought out of incognito. Beware 'Nessy' and the 'Sasquatch', it's just a matter of time.

So there it is, a gosh darn larger-than-life white moose, grandiose and unforgiving of itself. You have to wonder about this living embodiment of Nature's satire. It has none of the stealth of its brethren, unable to disappear into the road-side brush like the stealth bomber of the Central Newfoundland interior. Old 'Whitey' is more in-your-face, he need not cower into the cover of foliage, he may as well just stand in plain view proclaiming "Here I am, I'm not going anywhere, yes I am a Friggin' White Moose and I couldn't give a rat's ass what you think of that."

There is certainly a great risk in being so highly visible in a place where everyone wants to take a shot at you. The parallel can be made between Whitey and our Premier Danny Williams. Danny has gotten more media attention in his short term in office than any premier in the last few decades. Not since Joey Smallwood's telling recitation of a night after eating bad lobster in the song "Like 'e Would" has a premier captured the minds of the public psyche. Like Newfoundland and Labrador's Trudeau, Danny has been seen doing his pirouette all over hell's half acre. He has been on Larry King Live, the New York Times and has been quoted in every two-bit rag from Too-Good Arm to Tumbler Ridge. When Danny dares knock on the granite doors of Big Oil the mainlanders really start to take notice. Aaaah yes Oil, Black Gold, Texas Tea. Everyone uses it, everyone wants it, and Newfoundland and Labrador has it. Apparently taking on big oil is something akin to trying to get an audience with the Pope. Big, powerful and lots of people who will stand up for it, with few daring to stand against it. Danny "the white moose" Williams has dared poke his foot into the door of big oil's boardroom and announce to all "Hey buddy, what's the deal with Hebron?"

He has been compared to Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chevez as if he is a one man show in a province of subversives. Perhaps though if you were to look past Danny you just might catch a glimpse of a herd of half a million. You might be more surprised to see how many white moose there are in that herd. Necks out coaxing him on. "Give-er Danny", we will not hide in the shadows any longer. The white moose is here to stay.


WJM said...

Rex Murphy? More like Russell Wangersky.

BNB said...

hahaha I was hearing Rex Murphy when I reread it, that's a voice I just can't shake out of my head sometimes :) Oh well, there are worse people than Russell Wangersky.

kodak said...

Nice job bnb. I think Danny is doing right to not jump at every opportunity and/or threat that oil companies or mainland media point out to us. Oil companies off our shores are making "unforseen" profits, and there is more oil out there than was estimated originally. Hopefully he will hold to the "no more giveaways" attitude, and future premiers will follow that philosophy.

NL-ExPatriate said...

I'm thinking more along the lines of the Brown cow brown milk commercial.

I am a brown cow and I endorse this commercial.

A white moose from Central.

As for WJM any time he disagrees with a Newfoundland/Labradorians point of view you should take it as meaning your spot on and being in the best interests of NL.

BNB said...

I like the Brown Cow idea hahaha

Kodak - pretty sharp looking young fellow on your profile photo. Good pic :)

kodak said...

just playin' around with a new Nikon D70S, so decided to save this shot as "sepia" as opposed to b & w. Still learning the digital cam terms, techs, and tricks, a new hobby anyway.

WJM said...

As for WJM any time he disagrees with a Newfoundland/Labradorians point of view you should take it as meaning your spot on and being in the best interests of NL.

Funny... I do the same thing in reverse: whenever the Newfoundland nationalists get peeved, annoyed, or angry at what I say, I know I'm doing something right.

Patriot said...

From one white moose to another, great piece!!

BNB said...

Thanks Patriot :)